Isle of Wight grave vandalism insensitive admits Diocese of Portsmouth

Since last week's County Press front page, headlined 'Grave Shame', at least three more families have come forward to say they too have had memorials removed without any notice.

Apologising once again, the Diocese of Portsmouth, which oversees St Mary the Virgin, said it is the church, itself, which has added to national guidelines in place across the country.

However, it stopped short of saying items could stay on graves, and said relatives wanting to leave them, should apply for an exemption.

Read more: Isle of Wight mum disgusted as church clears items from baby's grave

It said it has made recommendations to the Parochial Church Council (PCC), which do not include clearing away memorials twice yearly and placing them in bin bags for collection, without warning.

A spokesperson for the PCC said it "deeply regrets" any pain it has caused to families and is "disappointed" that its efforts to inform them have failed.

A sign at the churchyard. (Image: Isle of Wight County Press)

A statement said: “We have a duty of care to both the historic church and graveyard and have to consider everyone’s wishes. We are also bound by national regulations.

"We hope to be able to work constructively with the parties concerned.”

One family told the County Press they thought memorials disappearing was the work of vandals, and were "shocked" to hear it was, in fact, the church.

They said their grandmother's grave, which has only being there for a few months, has been "desecrated", with a small wreath, potted flowers and sentimental ornaments among the items removed.

It is despite a sign on the grounds stating there is a 13-month grace period for mourners to leave items on new graves.

Picture shows what the grandmother's grave looked like before and after items were removed. (Image: Contributed)

The Diocese said it implements no such rules and has asked the church to change the sign to an alternative.

A statement from the Diocese said: “There is no rule that suggests items should be cleared away twice a year and placed in bin bags for collection, and we have advised the parish to cease this practice and to change the sign in the churchyard to reflect this.

"There is also no rule about a ’13-month grace period’ – we would prefer that bereaved families understood the rules and talked to us about any possible exemptions from the start.

"We have recommended an alternative sign for the parish to use, which reflects the situation more accurately."

Another family said artificial flowers placed on their mother-in-law's grave have been going missing, regularly, since June last year.

Last week the County Press reported how an Island mother felt her baby daughter was no longer at peace at the church.

The Diocese said it has apologised to all those families who have been in contact.